Monday, 3rd August 2020

Poor Tory councillors who have done nothing wrong to be unfairly punished by voters

INNOCENT Conservative councillors are set to be cruelly punished by electors meanly linking them with the actions of the Conservative government. 

Across Tory-voting areas of Britain, councillors who have done nothing but implement policies of unceasing austerity for almost a decade face losing their seats due to Brexit.

Councillor Joseph Turner of Dorset said: “Hey guys, I’m not the one who can’t get you Brexit. That’s your MP. I’m the one who closed all the libraries, remember?

“I’m as angry with Theresa May as you are, more so even, though I never actually voice it. But down here at local level there are bin collections to cut so I need to be re-elected.

“Don’t irrationally hit out at us, who’ve done nothing to harm some of you, because of them. We’re your wage-freezing friends.”

Voter Roy Hobbs, aged 67, said: “We’d have been out of the EU a whole joyful month if it wasn't for those fat cats in the town hall. Who’s the furthest right party? I’m voting for them.”