WHO needs a functioning opposition to f**k up a decade in government? Not the SNP! They’ve proved you can do it effectively and stylishly all on your own.
Yes, despite governing since 2007, benefiting from two popular leaders and winning the referendum they always wanted, the Scottish National Party are on the verge of total collapse without any help from anyone.
Humza Yousaf, the party’s most recent leader, said: “Opposition? Up here?
“The Tories only win in areas so deluded they think they’re English, the Labour vote’s negligible, we’ve basically got the whole country locked down, and look at us. Ruined. What an achievement.
“I, for example, have been in for over a year and what have I done? Nothing except blow up a coalition. Brought down by pissing off the Green party. Beat that.
“My predecessors? Well, the most recent one was ever so popular but now her husband’s charged with embezzlement of SNP funds, and the one before her was brought down by sexual assault allegations. Which he tried to use against everyone else. Didn’t go well.
“So here we stand, nobody challenging us, no idea who’s going to make up the government for the next two years, flat out f**ked, and we’ve done it entirely unaided. Go us.”
Sir Keir Starmer, leader of the Labour party, said: “Opposition’s overrated. There’s a lot to be said for just standing there.”
