Saturday, 5th December 2020

Why counting votes is undemocratic, by a MAGA twat

By Donald Trump retweeter Donna Sheridan

SNEAKY Democrats are trying to sabotage this election by placing more votes for their candidate than us Republicans. Let me explain why that undermines democracy while I disrupt ballot counting.

There’s a saying that Americans will always do the right thing once they’ve exhausted all the alternatives, and that applies to our voting process. It would be unpatriotic to do it properly off the bat.

Harassing people working at polling stations by waving signs and barking dog whistle slogans at the top of my lungs is just part of our fine democracy. Anyone preventing me from doing that is a socialist who should be shot in the face.

The next logical step will be to take the results to the court and demand a recount. We won’t do that in states where the GOP has won by a razor-thin majority of two votes though. That would be insane and corrupt.

What you rubberneckers from across the pond don’t realise is that once we’ve got the looting, rioting and civil warring out of our system, we’ll sit down like reasonable human beings and accept the result. That’s if Nevada’s finished counting by then.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to get into my truck and blast the horn while screaming “STOP THE COUNT”. Because that’s what true freedom looks like.