CREDULOUS cretins throughout the UK have managed to convince themselves that shed cake will taste much nicer than normal cake.

Hypnotised by the novel sales technique of placing cake in a small wooden outbuilding by a road and trusting buyers to leave cash, drooling morons now believe such cake must, logically, be superior.

Halfwit Tom Booker said: “This isn’t shop cake, or café cake, or any of those boring cakes. This is shed cake.

“It’s homemade, because they say it is, and look at the size of their house. Their kitchen probably has an island and granite worktops. If they’re that wealthy they must be incredible at making cake like Nigella is.”

Fellow bonehead Helen Archer said: “I have to try it because I jump on any new food trend and cake from a shed is one of those trends. I bet it’s absolutely brilliant, especially at these prices.

“Look, it’s all professionally packaged as if the person is running a business, even though they’re not because it’s in a shed. And you can’t have cream or anything because you can’t refrigerate a shed. So it’s essentially blondies and brownies. But from a shed.”

On leaving £5.50 in the honesty box for a brownie, Archer bit into it and said: “Oh. It’s just cake.”