FOOTBALL manager and brothel enthusiast Avram Grant has the world's finest wife, according to a new survey.
Tzofit Grant has won plaudits from married men after supporting her husband's visits to a Thai tug shop and offering to go with him next time and hold the baby oil.
A spokesman for polling company EDBT, said: "As well as being tall, attractive and talented, she obviously goes like Speedy Gonzales bursting for a shit. Eighty-five percent of our respondents wanted to know if she had a sister."
Tzofit is now expected to be crowned Woman of the Year next week, with polling having been formally closed 11 months early.
The spokesman added: "I don't see how any other woman is going to top this, unless Scarlett Johansson goes on an eight-month lesbian odyssey with a camcorder, or Sarah Brown finally does something useful with a pillow while he's sleeping."
Wayne Hayes, a panel beater from Carlisle, said: "My missus finds out I gave the receptionist from work a lift home – a lift, mind you – and I'm humping my hand for a month.
"Tzofit finds out her feller has been getting the banquet for four in a knocking shop and she gently chides him for not inviting her along. I. Am. In. Love."
The Porstmouth manager acknowledged his good fortune, saying: "Despite looking like the arch enemy of Dangermouse, Tzofit still loves me and supports my hobbies. I'd tell you what a great cook she is as well but you'd probably hunt me down and roast me over a campfire."
He added: "One thing I will say is this – that thing your wife only does begrudgingly on your birthday? Every morning before breakfast.