FOOTBALL fans are furious that matches are diverting attention away from the transfer market.
They want games in the Premier League to be put on hold so they can focus on their true passion, the pure thrills of the player marketplace.
Chelsea fan Donna Sheridan said: “A goal, three points, top of the league, who gives a shit? All I want to know is who’s triggering whose contractual buyout clause.
“How am I expected to pay attention to the game when I know the incredible spectacle of who owns Roberto Soldado’s image rights is being played out behind the scenes?”
Football agents, their paid shills in the media, and players all agree that who’s employing who is more exciting than wasting time kicking a ball.
A leading Chelsea manager, speaking anonymously, said: “The most elegant approach would be to total every club’s wage bill and the money they’ve spent on transfers, and the highest gross wins the title.
“If football wants to be taken seriously, then it needs to take the cameras from the grass to the boardroom.”
Spurs fan Wayne Hayes said: “The last day of August is enthralling – last-minute swoops, botched medicals, helicopters to eleventh-hour signings. Then unfortunately the fun’s over until January 1st.”
