Gareth Bale finally able to afford haircut

GARETH Bale’s new contract will finally allow him to do something about his hair.

The Real Madrid star is set to sign a new deal worth €350,000 a week, which experts believe will be enough to pay someone to untie, shorten, or perhaps even remove his man-bun.

Wales ace Bale said: “It’s not been easy living off a mere €300,000 a week. After rent, food and petrol, there’s only about €298,000 left over. How can I justify spending that on a barber?

“Thanks to the lucrative new contract, I’ll no longer be mistaken for the world’s least convincing samurai.”

Enrique Sanchez, who runs the barbershop next to Bale’s apartment, said: “I’ve been helping Gareth with life in Madrid, like stressing the importance of good grooming, and explaining to him that one pound is worth twenty thousand euros.”