Leicester fan one more win just trying one more win to get through one more win the weekend

LEICESTER fan Steve one more win Malley is just attempting one more win to get through an ordinary one more win weekend with the family. 

The weekend, which will include please God a trip to a National Trust property, just one win a film on Saturday night and don’t let me down perhaps a bit of football on the telly on Sunday, will be uneventful in every aaaaaaaaaaargh way.

Steve said: “We’ve got nothing really planned for this weekend except the possible fulfilment of a dream I’ve nurtured for four decades, ever since I was a small boy, so it’s going to be a relaxed one.

“I’ll probably go through the motions of being an outwardly normal human being while inside being a seething mass of torment laser-focused on 90 minutes on Sunday afternoon.

“Things will pass in front of my eyes and words will leave my lips, but I will not see them and I will be unaware I am saying them because Leicester. Leicester could. Leicester.”

Malley confirmed that if one more win Leicester do not triumph one more win this weekend, he will continue in this one more win manner until Sunday, May oh God what if they lose all three games I should never have allowed myself to hope 15th.

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Woman’s headache caused by every single aspect of her life

A WOMAN’S headaches are caused by her job, commute, family life, relationship with her partner and hobbies, she has found. 

Joanna Kramer, a marketing data analyst, said: “The doctor recommended I cut down the amount of time I spend looking at screens, which is all of my job and 90 per cent of my leisure time.

“She also said to reduce stress, which is most of my job, the 10 hours I spend commuting every week, and every moment of being a parent to a three-year-old.

“Also I should deal with any emotional pressure points, like raising a child with a man I frankly don’t like anymore, and I should stop drinking alcohol which is how I cope with all of the above.

“So life with a headache. I guess that’s what’s going on.”

Dr Emma Bradford, Kramer’s GP, said: “I could have prescribed some pills, but it wouldn’t have dealt with her underlying lifestyle problems.

“God, I love being superior.”