Runner trying to get conversation back on to the marathon

A MAN who completed the London marathon is trying to make colleagues talk about it without appearing too obvious.

After enjoying praise for his achievement, Tom Logan is now monitoring all workplace conversations for the opportunity to bring it up again.

Logan said: “It’s easy if someone asks how my weekend was because I can say ‘Great, apart from running 26 miles in the London bloody marathon!’.

“At lunch I’ll keep saying ‘this is just what I need to replace the lost calories’. Eventually someone has to ask me what I mean and ‘bingo’.

“I don’t think there’s much chance of discussing it in the strategy meeting, so I’ll just rub my leg frantically while saying ‘stiffening up!’”

Co-worker Nikki Hollis said: “Tom has managed to bring the marathon into conversations about photocopying, Beyonce and Game of Thrones, because it probably features some people running away from a dragon.”

Tim Peake bored out of his skull

SPACE is so incredibly boring, Tim Peake has confirmed.

After running along with the London Marathon on a treadmill in the International Space Station, the astronaut admitted he had absolutely nothing else to do.

Peake said: “If I have to marvel at the Earth’s breathtaking beauty one more time I’m going outside without my helmet.

“I don’t have a whole lot of leisure options up here. I can either float in one room or float in another.

“I wish I’d brought some games, like KerPlunk or Buckaroo. The little bits would float around when the horse ‘bucked’, but retrieving them all would have used up half a day.”

He added: “I’m considering pulling some wires out just to make things a bit more exciting.”