A COUPLE spending their holiday at Disneyland despite not having any children have been officially verified as deranged.
Tom Booker and his girlfriend Ellie Shaw go to Walt Disney’s Magic Kingdom in Orlando every summer, even though they are fully functional child-free adults in their mid-thirties.
Professor Henry Brubaker of the Institute for Studies said: “Given that these people have a compulsion to visit a giant theme park without being strong-armed into it by a six-year-old, there is only one diagnosis: they are completely mental.
“The whole place is like some horrible commercialised acid trip. Everything’s too expensive, people dressed as Mickey Mouse and Goofy won’t stop harassing you, and you spend hours queuing up for rides designed for toddlers.
“Any grown-ups who put themselves through that ordeal without having a child demand it are, scientifically speaking, completely batshit. Adults who don’t have kids should spend their holidays doing normal things, like going to nice pubs.”
Ellie Shaw said: “You don’t need kids to find things like princesses and giant talking mice entertaining. Some people like sunbathing or walking around art galleries. We just happen to enjoy spending our holidays in a magical palace surrounded by cartoon characters.
“Anyway, they actually have a lot of sophisticated stuff for adults, like an Avengers rollercoaster.”
