A BOOK has been declared officially worthwhile by clever people.
Less clever people are now scurrying to buy the 832-page tome in the hope of becoming more like the clever people, or at least looking cleverer while they are reading or pretending to read it.
Project manager Emma Bradford said: “I am very exciting about feeling obliged to read the book, whatever it is. I like clever things.
“I love that books make you think, but I hate thinking about which book to read.
“Somehow my instincts always lead me to novels about Cotswolds housewives having affairs with hunky vets, which I know are wrong.”
A spokesman for the Booker panel said: “It’s not about being clever, it’s about quality. Although that’s not to deny we’re clever, because clearly we are. Very.”