DISCOVERING an actor is gay can make the alien or superhero they are playing seem less realistic, it has been claimed.
After Matt Damon said being gay could harm actors’ careers, members of the public agreed they should stay in the closet to prevent them feeling uncomfortable about their favourite absurd characters.
Receptionist Nikki Hollis said: “Finding out Johnny Depp was gay would be as though Edward Scissorhands had been lying to me all these years, although obviously I have no problem accepting his massive hands made of scissors.
“So I think gay actors should keep it secret for the sake of their fans. Or they could only play obviously gay characters like C3PO or some sort of flying robot owl.”
Sales manager Roy Hobbs said: “If an actor’s gay I can’t really believe the love scenes. So Han Solo kissing Princess Leia while they’re hiding in the lair of a giant space worm in an asteroid field just wouldn’t be realistic.
“I’ve always thought it would be cool to go for a drink with Batman, but if Christian Bale was gay I’d have to go with a different superhero so we could talk about women. Probably Iron Man, or Captain America if he’s busy.”