Holly Willoughby explains concept of death to ITV viewers

HOLLY Willoughby has told ITV viewers why the lady in the box is asleep forever.

The pretty, large-breasted presenter gave a basic description of what death is so that her audience wouldn’t be too confused by the morning’s events.

She said: “When a man or lady gets old, they start to feel very tired. They have to lie down in a hospital bed and can only eat grapes and Ribena.

“Then they close their eyes and some men come and put them in a box. Their spirit floats off but they live on in your heart like The Lion King’s dad in your favourite film, The Lion King.

“It’s ok to feel sad.”

An ITV spokesman said: “Death is a delicate subject for our audience, which has a median mental age of three.

“Our worry was that they would get so terribly bothered they’d run out into the streets clutching their heads, then get clobbered by riot police.”

36-year-old ITV fan Julian Cook said: “I think I understand. But how long does a person stay dead for?

“Also when they come back to life are they glowing and invincible for a bit, like in computer games?”

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Riot rehearsals 'a success'

RUN-THROUGHS for tomorrow’s rioting have gone off without a hitch, according to organisers.

Anarchists practised smashing in shop windows with inflatable bricks, while police in full riot gear ran around tapping them with foam rubber batons.

Anti-capitalist Tom Booker said: “It’s going to be a big day so everything needs to run like clockwork.

“A couple of the coppers couldn’t resist trying out their new moves, but generally we all agreed it went well.”