This part of Brexit movie will be a montage, says director

BREXIT is currently in the part of the film where nothing happens for a while so it will be a montage set to music, it has been confirmed.

The montage will feature shots of Theresa May making phone calls, followed by shots of Jean Claude Juncker and Angela Merkel making phone-calls, all set to The Winner Takes it All by Abba.

The film’s director, Emma Bradford said: “This bit will be pretty dull. As will the rest of the film to be honest.

“The trailer will be very loud and feature Margot Robbie even though she is not actually in the film.”

Bradford added: “For the sake of the plot, we’re hoping that at some point Nigel Farage will get arrested in America and becomes someone’s ‘bitch’ in prison.”

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Idiots pay million quid to hear speeches by an arse

SOME idiots have paid a million quid to an arse just to hear him speak.

The arse was paid the million quid because he used to have an important job which he was very bad at.

Experts said the idiots either think he was good at the important job, or do not care and just want to give a million quid to an arse because he is a famous arse.

The experts also stressed that the arse has no choice but to charge the idiots as much as possible while he can before the next famous arse comes along.

Meanwhile, the arse also realises that if he does not make a lot of money then all he will have is the knowledge that he is an arse who was very bad at his job and who looks like the Child Catcher from Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.