MARRIED At First Sight has shocked viewers by horribly and openly exploiting participants. Which reality show are you convincing yourself it’s okay to watch instead?
Eleanor Shaw, conveyancer: “My Death Row Serial Killer Convict Wedding Execution Heartbreak on UKShit. It’s really sad because they’re so in love.”
Nikki Hollis, boutique wholesaler: “I watch vintage Jeremy Kyle from its 2005-2015 heyday. Because all those poor, deprived, damaged council estate scrotes are long, long dead.”
Hannah Tomlinson, nursery nurse: “To make sure there’s no genuine suffering, I only watch the fakest of the fake. Currently that’s Beauty and the Geek Netherlands and The Real Housewives of Cheshire.”
Will McKay, tractor photographer: “This BBC one where actors who dreamed of better are trapped for life in a nightmarish, nonsensical landscape of unexplained pregnancies and motiveless serial killers. EastEnders, it’s called.”
Roy Hobbs, slaughterhouse inspector: “The ultimate in exploitative reality TV. OnlyFans. Weirdly my wife’s not into it.”
