Blair Sells Peerages To Hamas

TONY Blair has made his first move as Middle East envoy by offering seats in the House of Lords to some of Palestine's most radical elements.

Baron Fruitloop of Jenin

Blair said he wanted to bring Hamas into the political mainstream and was able to do so at a very reasonable price.

The former prime minister stressed that active participation in the Upper House would make Hamas more responsible and stressed there was, "absolutely nothing wrong with selling peerages, apparently".

The funds will be paid into Blair's personal account and be used to keep his wife Cherie out of the public arena.

Blair added: "I truly believe that very soon we could be selling seats in the House of Lords to Hezbollah, Islamic Jihad and even Al Qaeda itself."

He has also begun talks on a series of football matches between the Israeli cabinet and the Hamas executive committee.

Blair said Newcastle and England striker Michael Owen would be willing to play for Hamas until they sort out a regular training programme.

"If that doesn't work I'll just sit down with them, hold their hands and stare at them until they hug me," he added.