Thomas Cook ad to feature 'Debaser'

THOMAS Cook has become the latest travel company to base a television advert on a song by the Pixies.

Following Thomson’s success with Where is My Mind and Butlin’s use of Wave of Mutilation, the new campaign by the 170 year-old tour operator will feature the orginal version of Debaser.

The 30 second advert will show a happy family walking along a Spanish beach at sunset, intercut with footage of an eyeball being sliced open.

A spokesman said: “Andalusia is one of our most popular destinations so we wanted a jingle that truly captured that sense of freedom and relaxation.

“In recent years our brand identity may have led some people to think that we are not groovy, but we are. We are so groovy and we want you to know.”

Pixies frontman Frank Black gave permission, insisting his inspiration for the song, Un Chien Andalou, the surrealist short film by Louis Bunuel and Salvador Dali, was originally an advert for panty liners.

The Thomas Cook spokesman added: “Summer holidays are all about fun, sunshine and horrific eye injuries.

“Summer is such an important part of the magic of childhood and we want to convey the idea that our holidays are not only memorable but could also inspire one of our young customers to grow up to be a debaser.”

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Andy Carroll listed on Ebay

LIVERPOOL has placed former striker Andy Carroll on the auction site Ebay with a reserve price of 99p.

Manager Kenny Dalglish has listed Carroll under ‘Sporting Goods – Football – Other – Novelty Items’ and has asked the buyer to collect, given the  freight charges in transporting such an unwieldy unit.

Overseas buyers were considered unlikely to be interested as Carroll has not had his injections.

Assistant manager Steve Clarke said: “Our seller rating has dipped quite a lot after a terrible review from Chelsea, but Torres was in perfect nick when he left here. Parcelforce are fucking shit.”

He added: “We’ve always tried to leave positive ratings when buying ourselves, although we have had to report Sunderland to Ebay for the Henderson because it’s nothing like the photos they posted of it passing the ball properly and scoring goals.”

Carroll has a ‘Buy It Now’ price of £25m but  if no bids are received the club will either place an advert on Freecycle or just tie him to a lamppost with his feeding instructions taped to his forehead.

Dalglish had hoped the funds raised by auctioning Carroll would help with the major restoration work on Fabio Aurelio but club sources said taking away his credit card during the January sales had ‘helped things enormously’.

Clarke said: “If the lamppost doesn’t work we’ll probably just wait until it’s dark, find a building site and then heave him into a skip.”