WETHERSPOON has unveiled its new ‘Brexit Chaos’ breakfast, which includes an unknown quantity of vague, ever-changing ingredients.
A Wetherspoon spokesman said: “F*ck knows what it actually is. Just like the actual Brexit you’ll demand it without any idea whatsoever you’re getting.
“Might be a bowl of chips, some cherry tomatoes and a spoonful of peanut butter. Or a microwave lasagne. Or a pineapple.
“But you’ll demand it and then you’ll also have to pretend to be happy with what you’re given.
“And of course you can have a cheap pint with it even though it’s your breakfast, you’re not celebrating anything, you’re not on holiday and we really do care about your life expectancy.”