Cat will eat rat but not cheaper catfood

A CAT has refused to eat a slightly cheaper brand of catfood, despite having recently eaten a rat.

Three-year-old cat Dustin has not touched the off-brand kibbles even though they appear more or less identical to the ones he was previously being fed.

Dustin’s owner Mary Fisher said: “You’d have thought that if you’re prepared to eat a large brown rat bones-and-all, as I found him doing last week on the doormat, you’d be okay with a few fish-flavoured biscuits, even if they’re not the exact type you’re used to.”

She added: “He was getting the expensive Royal Canin shit, but I recently lost my job so it’s back on the Whiskas I’m afraid.

“I am skint so I’d really appreciate it if Dustin could get with the program on this one. Especially if he loves me as much as advertisers claim.”

However Dustin said: “I’m not fucking touching that. Yes I will eat a rodent but those kibbles are just not quite right.

“She needs to raise her game otherwise I’m not going to eat anything until I get really thin and the neighbours call the RSPCA.

“Apparently in those animal shelters you get lobster flavour Sheba.”

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Your astrological week ahead, with Psychic Bob

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