BRITAIN’S national bird is Orville, the ultimately unsuccessful duck.
The 1980s green nylon avian toddler won 92 percent of the votes in a nationwide poll, with the remaining votes split between funkypigeon.com, the twitter logo and a roast chicken.
Organiser Roy Hobbs said: “Orville symbolises our national desire to fly way up to the sky even though we obviously cannot. And, perhaps, should not.
“And, like the average Briton, he has a fat little body, feeble, pointless limbs, glassy, lifeless eyes, incontinence pants, a man’s hand up his bottom and a small orange beak.”