MEAT suppliers are falling over each other to rhapsodise about how happy and fulfilled their livestock were before being slaughtered to please you.
From fancy butchers to supermarkets, an enchanting picture of joyous free-range grass-fed gambols in sunlit fields is painted right up until the moment the big trucks arrived to the farm.
Carolyn Ryan, from Colchester, said: “Apparently this lamb led a life of absolute pampered bliss right until I, basically, ordered its execution.
“On the one hand at least it was happy. On the other that kind of makes me the bad guy? And now I’m going to eat it?
“I don’t want chickens that were dancing around the barnyard doing impromptu musical numbers. I want my meat miserable.”
Posh Ludlow butcher Norman Steele said: “This lovely cut of aged York ham comes from a year-old pig called Blackie, who was ever so friendly and used to snuffle acorns from your hand.
“He was almost like a person. It’s £60 for the whole shoulder.”