Holidaying Trump reveals true tentacled form
ALIEN creature Donald Trump has dropped its human being disguise while on holiday.
The squid-like extraterrestrial Trump, which spends most of the year encased in a fairly realistic latex man-suit, hopes to relax and stretch out its tentacles during a 17-day golf break.
Trump said: “It’ll be great to just step away from it all and float around in a special tank of chemicals designed to mimic the purple seas of my home planet.
“Occasionally aides will lob in a live calf or homeless person as a snack, otherwise I’ll just be kicking back with a John Grisham or slithering around a golf course.
“It’s a much-needed break as I’m under a lot of pressure from work. I’m supposed to destroy human civilisation by 2019 so that my species can come and harvest the planet’s natural resources.
“Damn I think that was supposed to be a secret. But everybody’s guessed by now anyway.”