AL-QAEDA chiefs admit they have slipped well below ISIS in the world’s evil league table.
The terror group’s slump in form has seen them overtaken by ISIS, Boko Haram, Russia, North Korea and Network Rail.
And while the terror group used to have its pick of promising young radicals, it is increasingly reliant on unpaid interns using it to pad CVs before moving on to lucrative martyrdoms with more prestigious groups.
Al-Qaeda leader Ayman al-Zawahiri said: “A drone circled overhead yesterday, carrying a full payload of missiles, but the moment it recognised us it flew off.
“I doubt we’ll even get invited to Kim Jong-un’s birthday this year.”
One Al-Qaeda intern said: “I spend the day cold-calling, asking people if they’d be interested in some terror. People are polite but they’ve always got their evil needs covered by another provider.
“I wish I’d taken that traineeship with British Gas.”