Excessive exclamation mark users vow they will ‘never stop!!!’
PEOPLE who use a ludicrous number of exclamation marks have refused to write in a less annoying style.
Excessive punctuation fans say they will continue to make their texts and emails look as if they have been written by an excitable seven-year-old girl.
Administrator Francesca Ryan said: “Exclamation marks are brilliant because they instantly make a really dull message incredibly exciting.
“If you write ‘Hi Kate, how you doing?’ that’s just boring. But if you write ‘Hi Kate!!!!!!!! How you doing!!!!??!??!?!!?!!!??!!!!’ it’s so much more wacky and fun.
“Anyone who thinks it looks stupid can fuck off, and that includes the company I’ve just applied for a job with using a covering letter that starts ‘Dear Sir!!!’.”
Office worker Tom Booker said: “Exclamation marks are the only way of conveying my sheer joy at being alive, like today when I texted ‘Going 2 greggs for lunch!!!!!!!!!!’.”
Grammar expert Mary Fisher said: “People should ask themselves if they really want to send messages that look as though they’ve had a stroke while pressing down shift and 1.
“It looks terribly childish, so they really should desist. Sorry, I meant ‘desist!!!!!!’.”