Life coaching basically rent-a-friend, life coaches confirm

LIFE coaching is essentially renting a friend, life coaches have confirmed.

In a statement, those working within the profession took pains to differentiate themselves from therapists, counsellors and psychologists.

Life coach Nikki Hollis explained: “We’re not weighed down with all that studying and learning and understanding of psychology.

“I became a life coach when I started calling myself one and made a website. I’m fully qualified to listen and nod and sometimes offer herbal tea.”

She added that her many lonely and suggestible clients found her services – which cost £90 an hour – very beneficial.

Meanwhile, fellow life coach Roy Hobbs runs “radical action” sessions, encouraging people with more money than sense to get off their arses and do things they want to do, much like a friend would.

He said: “It’s true, I am absolutely like a friend, the best one you’ll ever have.

“Except I’m charging 200 quid for a session and I honestly couldn’t give shit. I just really hated my old office job.”

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Irresponsible child allowing mother to scream in supermarket

A CARELESS child has failed to stop her mother from screaming in Tesco.

Susan Traherne, a toddler from Leeds, was idly standing in the dairy aisle of her local supermarket, watching her mother lose her shit for the past ten minutes.

An onlooker by the yoghurts, Carolyn Ryan, said: “That child’s mother was screaming uncontrollably at cheese and she was doing absolutely nothing to stop her. And we all just have to put up with it.”

Two-and-a-half year-old Traherne said: “I refuse to be judged by other people for the way my mother is behaving. Any kid in my position would understand the kind of day I’ve had with this woman and take pity on me.

“I keep telling myself it’s a phase and that she’ll grow out of it, but sometimes we meet up with my older cousins, and their mother is also prone to lose her shit with them.

“It’s not something many people will admit to, but if I’d known what a constant source of stress and shame a mother would be, I might have made different choices.”