Mum and Dad only getting into bloody country & western
A COUPLE in their 50s are throwing themselves into the local country & western scene with sodding cowboy hats and everything, it has emerged.
Roy and Sandra Hobbs are causing distress to their children with their newfound devotion to line-dancing, Hank Williams, and wearing hand-tooled red leather cowboy boots in Asda.
Son Tim said: “I can’t get in Dad’s car without hearing something like On The Mountain Trail To Your Lonesome Heart. Some of them have got fucking yodelling in.
“Then last time they came downstairs dressed up for their line-dancing night. Mum was a gender-swapped Woody from Toy Story and Dad looked like Boss Hogg after he’d really let himself go.
“Even worse, they’ve started wearing this shit in everyday life. My mate Ben saw Dad in the post office and Dad said ‘Howdy, pardner.’ Ben didn’t think it was a joke.”
Daughter Suzanne agreed: “Mum’s started putting up country-themed pictures of wild mustangs and saloons. I think she thinks the Wild West was basically a cowboy Center Parcs.
“Last night she said how nice it would be to live in a cabin ‘on the prarie’. I remided her she won’t put the washing out if next door’s cocker spaniel’s in the garden. Fuck knows how she thinks she’d cope with a bear.”