AN uncle has decided the entire family should be enslaved in his tedious quest to research their family history.
Retired accountant Martin Bishop feels he is creating a valuable historical record despite all his relatives secretly wishing he would die rather than tell them about discovering another 19th century stranger who worked as a farmer.
Bishop said: “Family history is fascinating. I’ve uncovered some amazing stuff, like there were 17 Bishops related to us living in the Melton Mowbray area in 1850. Although I’m not sure what you can do with that information.
“The great thing is nowadays with the internet I can let everyone share in my research. Just today I asked my sister-in-law Julia if she remembers any older members of the family telling her about relatives living in Todmorden. She hasn’t replied yet.
“Admittedly all the ancestors so far have turned out to be something unremarkable like roofers and maids, but there’s always the chance you’re related to the aristocracy.
“That’s really why people research their family tree, but we don’t admit it because we’d look like forelock-tugging creeps.”
Niece Kelly Howard said: “F**k, he’s on WhatsApp again asking me if I’ve done my DNA testing yet. I suppose I’d better find the kit and hope no one makes an evil clone of me.
“Maybe Uncle Martin should just accept that hundreds of years ago some branch of our family decided to set up shop in Swansea. That’s their problem. Plus they’re skeletons.”
