A MOTHER has confirmed that if she had been in her daughter’s shoes for every major decision in her life, it would have worked out much better.
Mary Fisher has made clear to 28-year-old daughter Katie that the way she is living her life flies in the face of everything she herself would do, and is thus a terrible mistake.
She continued: “For a start I would have got into Cambridge instead of buggering up the interview because I was obsessed with some boy going to Brighton. Just to start with.
“If I were in Katie’s shoes – which I often imagine I am – I would be earning more, going on loads more dates and generally living up to my expectations. I’d certainly have my own flat and I’d be having a clandestine affair with an older, sophisticated man.
“Her youth really is wasted on her. I already know all of the things I’d do differently if I had the chance, so it only makes that she should learn from my mistakes and let me make the decisions. She wouldn’t be a size 14 if I were pulling the strings.”
Daughter Katie said: “Her advice includes putting on Tinder that I’m ‘looking to get pregnant before I’m 30’ and that I should take a shorthand course. I’m a f**king software engineer.
“I’d never interfere in my daughter’s life like she does. When I have a daughter I’ll only be helpful, and give great advice she’ll want to follow, and live vicariously through her in a healthy, supportive way.”