VEHICLES described by men as ‘women’s cars’ do not have breasts or a vagina, experts have discovered.
The ‘women’s cars’ were given a thorough examination but nothing gender specific was discovered, despite a stereo button having a passing resemblance to an erect nipple.
Professor Henry Brubaker, of the Institute for Studies, said: “There’s a lot of confusion, but cars are genderless lumps of metal and plastic, like snails that ruin the environment.
“Some alpha males refer to cars as ‘she’ because they’re too insecure to consider the idea of riding a man into work.
“Some cars have been labeled ‘women’s cars’ by petrol-head chauvinists because slagging off an MX-5 helps them deal with the fact that their wives have left them.
“We also found no evidence of hairdressers in ‘hairdresser’s cars’.”
Brubaker added: “The confusion over cars and gender may also come from BMW X5s. They’re considered ‘men’s cars’ but although they don’t have a dick they are driven by dicks.”