ANY child that touches Pudsey bear will get a massive electric shock, it has emerged.
Wary of further accusations of ’70s style’ behaviour involving minors, the BBC has electrified all of its Pudsey costumes. The wearer is protected by special insulation, but anyone who touches the bear will get a jolt strong enough to kill an adult cat.
Parent Tom Logan said: “We were at a Family Fun Day in Derby, my six-year-old Sam ran up to Pudsey and hugged his leg.
“There was a crackling sound, a terrible smell of melting hair and an ear-piercing scream as my son was catapulted across the playing field like a shot putt.
“Apparently Sam had some Fanta on his hands which had amplified the current. He survived but is now terrified of any sort of humanoid animals, which pretty much means his early childhood is ruined.
“This has changed my attitude towards Children in Need from grudging tolerance to outright hostility.”
However mother-of-two Emma Bradford said: “I still don’t think they’ve done enough. How do you know who’s in the costume?
“They should make the suit see-through so you can be sure the person inside isn’t having a wank.”