USING language to express ideas is far too much trouble, it has been agreed.
With ‘emojis’ increasingly replacing words, many people are now going a step further and returning to a pre-language, animalistic existence.
Professor Henry Brubaker, from the Institute for Studies, said: “If we all stopped using words, think how much time it would free up for 10-pin bowling.
“What’s the point of knowing fancy words like ‘silhouette’ and ‘caravan’ when we could simply express ourselves by grabbing our genitals.
“Most conversations are rubbish anyway. My mouth hurts now. Go away.”