NOT sure how to celebrate your dad this Father’s Day? Here are five ways to make the old man feel appreciated:
Watch cricket together in silence
Your dad’s had a busy week, so let him catch up with the cricket he’s taped by watching it with him in complete silence. You could humour him by talking about the quality of the batsmanship, although if you don’t make a sound he’ll soon forget you’re even there, which is what you both really want.
Pretend to have trouble parking a car
Your dad loves to take charge and correct people, especially when it comes to practical matters. So what could be better than failing to parallel park in an exaggerated fashion? He’ll know you’re putting on a show to entertain him, but that won’t stop him from shouting advice at you before pushing you out of the driver’s seat to show you how it’s done.
Talk about his favourite war
Indulge your dad’s love for military history by starting a chat about his favourite war. If you’re not sure if he prefers the Boer War, the Second World War or Columbia’s La Violencia, a cursory glance at his bookshelf should provide the answer. For bonus points, nod your head and say ‘wow, really?’ at regular intervals and ask him who won.
Give him a tenner
Your dad has no desire to receive a piece of folded card from Paperchase with a picture of a beer bottle on it. You’re better off slipping him a crisp ten pound note he’s free to spend on silicone caulk or an Airfix kit. Appeal to his sense of humour by saying ‘they only had these woke plastic notes’ when you hand it over.
Leave him to his shed
The best way to bond with your dad this Father’s Day is to leave him undisturbed in his shed for the duration. You might think he’d get lonely in there, but after a solid 24 hours in the company of his tools he’ll come out looking almost as happy as he does in those photos from before you were born. Not quite, but almost.