Woman thought there would be more to life than sniffing her children’s PE kits

A WOMAN who thought adult life would be exciting spends more time smelling things before putting them in the washing machine than she would like.

Eleanor Shaw achieved her childhood dream of becoming an entertainment lawyer and yet has not managed to escape doing household tasks that are both unpleasant and a bit strange.

Shaw said: “When I was little I imagined adult life would mainly involve wearing a suit with shoulder pads and drinking cocktails in the bath, though I suppose I was under the influence of Dynasty and Kylie Minogue at the time.

“Every so often I’ll have a moment of sudden clarity and realise that I’ve just used up 40 minutes of my life pulling various types of hair out of the plughole or wiping humous out of backpacks.

“Why do I have to do this shit? If we’re intelligent enough to work out how to map the human genome, why can’t we invent a robot that does all of this nonsense for us? The furthest we’ve got is fucking Siri. 

“She may be able to order some more toilet roll but until she can wash the weird gunk out of the compost bin I’m not interested.”