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Scots Tories Back Referendum On Existence Of Scots Tory Party

SENIOR Tories last night backed a referendum on whether the Scottish Conservative Party is real or a figment of Annabel Goldie's imagination.

The existence of the Scottish Tory Party has dominated political debate in Scotland for a decade.

But sceptics point out that even if the Scottish Tory Party did exist it would be a dismal failure.

At Holyrood, what remained of the centre-right parliamentary group has now been replaced by a a loose collection of individuals who enjoy earning £50,000 a year.

One senior Tory said: "It's time we settled this question once and for all.

"I'd like there to be a Scottish Tory party, I really would, but I just don't believe in it. If it was real it would do things and get noticed by other human beings."

The source added: "I'm told people do turn up to meetings. But most of them are very old and are possibly confused and in completely the wrong place."

But Annabel Goldie insisted she was the leader of an "actual thing" and offered to produce photographs of so-called 'Scottish Tory Conferences' in places like Perth.