NIGEL Farage has admitted conducting research into foreign female genitalia.
The UKIP leader visited a Strasbourg strip club on a vagina fact-finding mission.
He concluded that foreign vaginas are all well and good, but they lack the strong redoubtable character of the classic English ‘fanny’.
Farage said: “During the course of the evening I was able to compare ladies’ undercarriages of various nationalities.
“There was even a woman called ‘Deluxe’ who said she was from ‘wherever I wanted her to be from’ which frankly made no sense.
“I have to say, the vaginas on display that night were overall not nearly as well-engineered as the English labia I encountered at similar establishments back when I was working in the City.
“Also the foreign drinks are far too strong. They can make you do things you wouldn’t normally, like getting on a girl’s leg and saying ‘I’m a bad bulldog’.”
Farage added that he was ‘less okay’ with foreign penises: “I’ve never seen it myself but apparently Bulgarians have two penises.
“And Germans have a fingernail instead of a bell end.”