Osborne perfects smirk

GEORGE Osborne has been hailed as the greatest smirker in history.

After revealing swingeing government cuts, the chancellor strolled nonchalantly to a Remembrance Sunday ceremony with a look that smirking experts have hailed as a new benchmark.

Facial expression analyst Nikki Hollis said: “The curl of the pursed lips, the slightly narrowed eyes, the scampering demeanour – this is a new pinnacle for smirking.

“He looks like a weasel that’s just stumbled on a big nest of duck eggs. Osborne is the most naturally gifted smirker of his generation.”

Mother-of-two Mary Fisher said: “Whenever I see a picture of Osborne doing that look I quickly read the accompanying text to find out who’s getting fucked over this time.

“I hate the bastard but credit where it’s due, that is a flawless smirk.

“It inspired me to spend the last half hour doing smirks in the mirror and I couldn’t nail it. It’s the eyes, you can’t fake those cold, bead-like little eyes.”