Monday, 25th May 2020

Tommy Robinson still available in his shed

TOMMY Robinson has confirmed that, while he has been banned from Twitter, Facebook and Instagram, he continues to be available in his shed. 

The former EDL leader who is currently locked in a toxic, enabling relationship with UKIP, has invited his fans to make the pilgrimage to the 8ft-by-6ft shed where he is currently exposing the outrageous pro-Islam bias of the mainstream media.

He said: “Twitter’s full of lefties. Facebook’s full of bleating sheep. Instagram’s for girls and gays.

“But here in my shed you’re going to be getting the unvarnished truth about Britain. They can’t hold me in contempt of court for what I say here. You can’t libel anyone in a shed.

“I’m in here most of the day, because the wife says I get under her feet in the house and the kids say they can’t hear the telly over me going on about grooming gangs, so come round whenever.

“We’re probably going to make it UKIP headquarters once we’ve slimmed the party down enough to just the right people.”

But neighbour Tomasz Raczynski said: “What he’s telling you? His shed? Is my bloody shed. He borrowed it.”