CAROL Vorderman is to head a Conservative Party taskforce to help people work out if debt consolidation loans are really such a good idea after all.
The Tories said the former Countdown star was ideally suited to the post as one of the country's leading experts in lots of big, confusing interest rates.
Vorderman said: "Let's say you have £20,000 in outstanding credit which, if you just stopped buying shit you don't need, you could pay off in around six years with interest payments of about £7,000.
"But if you rolled it all up into your mortgage and paid it off over 20 years you could continue to buy the shit you don't need and pay interest of just £14,000.
"£14,000 divided by £7,000 equals £2 which you then multiply by 10,000 to get the number you started with. Maths is so much easier than you think."
She added: "Meanwhile, if the value of your property then drops like a brick, you're faced with the new and exciting problem of who to complain to when you're thrown into the street.
"Of course the simple answer to all of that is to make sure you built up a large fortune selling expensive loans and pointless detox diets while earning even more money by doing sums on the telly."
Tory leader David Cameron said: "Interest rates are incredibly important. For instance I am particularly fascinated by media interest rates.
"So if I needed someone to head-up a taskforce about maths teaching, I suppose I could ask a professor of maths or someone who had actually taught maths in a school, but then the interest rate would be very small indeed. Do you see?"