INCREDIBLY wealthy nations have surprisingly cleaned up at the Olympics.
America, Britain and China surprised everyone by winning the most medals after coincidentally spending a fortune on training and development.
An Olympics spokesman said: “Wealthy nations just happen to be the best at sport. They’re probably more motivated or something.
“Anyway it’s a great inspiration to less affluent countries to try harder, or at least buy some trainers with fancy soles.”
Professor Henry Brubaker of the Institute of Studies added: “The Olympics is great but it’s still nowhere near as good as the 1980 animated film, Animalympics, which is an absolute masterpiece.
“There’s no doping scandals in it, no lying about getting held up at petrol stations and you get to see an alligator called Bolt Jenkins break the high jump, pole vault and the 100 meter dash records.
“And you can watch it all in under an hour and a half unlike the actual Olympics which feels like it’s been going on for fucking months.”