Monday, 8th March 2021

Six Nations fans forced to piss in pint glasses over Zoom

THE pandemic has left Rugby Union supporters with no option but to be unbearable twats in the safety of their own homes.

Fans have confirmed they are deeply disappointed not to be able to get pissed and act like total arseholes on the stands at Twickenham this year as is traditional.

England supporter James Bates said: “It’s extra gutting that we can’t even meet up in the pub and ruin it for other drinkers with our matching red chinos, boat shoes and annoying braying voices.

“I mean, why have a wazz in an empty pint glass if you can’t throw it at the pitch or dare Rocco and Jasper to drink it? Necking ten pints of warm bitter and singing songs about slavery in your own living room just isn’t the same.”

A spokesman for the Six Nations Championship said: “Although we’ll miss the fans, we’re incredibly pleased that we are allowed to continue to offer elite sporting matches.

“Well, if you don’t count the ones with Scotland or Italy playing. They’re always shit.”