YOUNG people worldwide are now obsessed with emulating the cultural habits of the Scots, it has emerged.
‘Scottishmaxxing’ has blown up on TikTok, with teenagers from around the world washing a Lorne sausage down with Irn Bru and spending evenings binging Take The High Road while sipping Speyside single malts.
Joshua Hudson of Los Angeles said: “You’ve met me at a very Scotch time in my life. Notice the accent. 100 per cent Shrek.
“Yesterday I completely Scotmogged my pal Ryan when I wore a ‘bunnet’ like Jack from Still Game, no cap. He tried to kilt me out but was in a bogus unregistered tartan.
“He thought he had Connery rizz but looked like a chud with his Nicola Sturgeon lid. He actually thought it was bussin’ – what an ‘eejit’. Or should I say ‘weapon’.”
Despite having never set foot in the nation, Joshua has hired a tutor for his Glaswegian accent and often wanders his Bel Air neighbourhood in a shell suit while holding a bottle of tonic wine, just like a real Scotsman.
He continued: “Mom – sorry, ‘Mam’ told me to speak American. I said ‘I’m gonnae no’ dae that,’ and carried on watching a vintage Billy Connolly VHS that cost me $200 to import. I am also developing an interest in the Krankies.”
Genuine Scot Bill McKay responded to the trend by saying, “Aw for f**k’s sake, those Yank f**ks can get tae f**k,” which is thought to indicate his wholehearted approval.
