THE police have confirmed they do not investigate the vast majority of burglaries because the shops are open and you can get another laptop this afternoon.
While admitting the figure looked bad, police said they are reluctant to fingerprint, check CCTV and interview suspects just to track down and return your personal iPad to you when others are available.
A spokesman said: “They’ve nicked your stuff. Don’t make it our problem.
“If they’d stolen a painting gifted to you by your own dear mother then I’d understand your rage, but they haven’t, have they? They’ve stolen cash, a MacBook and a Bluetooth speaker because they’re as uninterested in sentimental value as we are.
“You bought them online, you’ve got the receipt in your email, you’ve got a crime number. Call your insurance and wait for them to authorise a shopping spree. Don’t pretend that stolen power drill ‘was very important to you.’ This isn’t The Repair Shop.
“We’ve got more to worry about than a few simple burglaries. There’s real crime to deal with. People are tweeting out here.”
Thomas Booker of Wilmslow said: “But my £5,200 Rolex Oyster was stolen. £5,200 in easy cash and I left it sitting on a shelf downstairs. That has to be the police’s fault.”
