Arts & Entertainment

Five ways to earn money on YouTube by being a talentless wanker

DO you have zero skills? Wondering if you can make it as a YouTube star? Earn millions with our helpful guide:

Six terrible TV shows you can’t believe you loved as a kid

THANKS to the internet it’s easy to fondly revisit a programme you loved as a child, only to discover it was utter shit. Here are some of the most egregious examples.

Woman settling down in front of TV to look at phone

A WOMAN is looking forward to a night in front of the television looking at her phone.

Anne Robinson already preparing sarcastic bollocks for Countdown

ANNE Robinson is enthusiastically preparing snide put-downs based on word puzzles and maths problems after being confirmed as the new host of Countdown.

Vinyl album still in shrinkwrap four years after purchase wondering what the f**k's going on

A VINYL LP that has languished unopened since being bought by a nerdy record collector is wondering if it will ever be taken out of its sleeve.

Mark Kermode's pretentious review of an empty cinema

CINEMAS have been pushing boundaries recently by showing f**k all. Mark Kermode reviews their minimalist content.

Woman desperate to be Angel from Escape to the Chateau

A WOMAN has decided she has had enough of her own life and would like to be Angel from Escape to the Chateau instead.

Six embarrassing 80s hits you won't admit you secretly love

WOULD you be mortified if people knew which cheesy 1980s songs you listen to on your own? Here are the shameful musical secrets on your YouTube playlist.

Friend wants you to watch show that only gets good in season seven

A FRIEND is trying to convince you to watch a programme that only starts to get interesting during its seventh season.

A gammon's guide to poetry

AS A Wetherspoons daytimer and West Ham fan, you can trust me when I tell you poetry isn’t just for girls and Scots anymore. But before you write your Ode to Brexit, there’s a few things you should know.