Arts & Entertainment

Five ways the Grange Hill movie will massively let you down

THE Grange Hill movie is guaranteed to ruin your childhood by being a massive let-down. Here’s how it will disappoint.

Tits for no reason: the essential features of every 80s film

EVERYONE loves 80s movies for their neon palette and banging synthesised soundtracks. But rewatching them reveals other key elements which are bizarre...

The unmissable cultural events you'll miss in 2022

A VIBRANT, thrilling programme of theatre, art and contemporary dance events are scheduled for this year. Here’s why you’ll miss them.

Being a winner on Antiques Roadshow, and other TV dreams of the middle-classes

THE middle-classes don’t really approve of appearing on television because it’s vulgar and boastful. But they do dream of appearing on these.

The seven shittest Christmas number ones of all time

IT IS a tradition as British as the Queen’s Speech to send an absolutely shit song to number one for Christmas. These are seven of the worst.

Six questions that really need answering about the Nativity

HAVE you always been a bit confused by the nativity story? Here are some issues the Bible – or its author God – really needs to clear up.

Glaring plot holes in pantomimes exposed

THEIR very existence and ability to draw in huge crowds is confusing enough, but these pantomime plot holes make even less sense.

Dad revisits annual boast that he'd have 'f**king battered' that kid in Home Alone

A MIDDLE-AGED man has again told his Home Alone-watching children that he would have given Kevin McCallister a ‘bloody good hiding’.

A Christmas Carol adapted by the BBC to represent 'both sides'

A NEW adaption of the Dickens classic will dispense with the woke socialist values of the original and offer a balanced view on hoarding wealth.

Six Christmas movies to remind you that you’ve failed in life and love

WATCHING feel-good films that remind you how badly your life is going is a Christmas tradition. Here are some favourites to make you miserable.