Celebrity

ALL the celebrities who once tweeted ‘we’re in this together’ are sunning themselves in Mexico and Dubai like the wankers they are, it has emerged.

OUR brains had a lot to process this year so if your nightmares have involved some pretty weird shit, you’re not alone.

YULETIDE greetings! There are many wholesomely Christian traditions to which we Rees-Moggs subscribe. If you too want a decent, honest, British Christmas, take heed.

UNTIL Meghan Markle is flogging cut-price clothes on a minimum wage Daily Mail readers are not going to be satisfied.     

BRITONS already weary of the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge’s tour of the UK have suggested actual jobs they could do.

THERE are the disgusting, flatulent multitudes who blow off all the time, and those who roam the earth like perfect, wind-free angels. Here are six of them.

IT'S been almost a week since right-wing darling Laurence Fox was in the news for hosting a large gathering. With the oxygen of publicity running low, how will he get attention next? 

HI, I’M Rita Ora, the pop star you can’t name any hits by. Would you like to make a ‘serious and inexcusable error of judgement’ like me?

A PRESENT made with love, care and your own two hands is always better than something shop-bought, especially if it’s a sex toy. Hand out these this Yuletide.

BACK in happier times the nation chose our 100 Greatest Britons and put Churchill at the top. But in the divided country we now live in, who would make the list?