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Celebrity

Royals can have privacy whenever they give us the money back

THE Royal family can enjoy the privacy they crave as soon as they return their money, art treasures and at least four of their palaces back to the nation.

Andrew punished by becoming a regular shitmuncher like you

PRINCE Andrew has been punished for his crimes and lies by being reduced to the state of being just a regular nobody just like you.

Cruise and Kidman to sexlessly reunite

Prince Andrew: 'Thank God the letter where I say "I, like you, am an enthusiastic paedo" hasn't been found'

PRINCE Andrew believes he is fine as long as the letter where he bonds with Jeffrey Epstein about their shared love of underage girls has not surfaced.

We ask you: were you shaken to the core by the revelation Victoria Beckham had an eating disorder?

A NEW documentary about Victoria Beckham has turned Britain’s world upside down by revealing she had an eating disorder in the 1990s. How are you coping?

'It's so important children not be on smartphones apart from mine for whom it doesn't matter'

Jilly Cooper, and other celebrities tough to memorialise because of shagging

A CAREER based in large part on sexual intercourse makes the tributes slightly awkward when you pass on. These luminaries will be tough to remember respectfully.

Prince William's interview with pie-f**ker's dad very regal

Lee Meriwether as Catwoman: Weird formative crushes your partner fails to live up to

WE all had odd childhood crushes, and it’s likely they’re lodged in your psyche forever. Here are some of the slightly obscure hotties your current partner cannot hope to live up to.

'I miss my grandmother. She didn't think I was a dick'

PRINCE William has confided in the tabloid press that he misses his grandmother because unlike his father, brother and Britain, she had a high opinion of him.