International
THE mugshot of Donald Trump is capable of reading your innermost thoughts, it has been confirmed.
FORMER president Trump believes he looks resolute and powerful in his mugshot, not like a petty, resentful pensioner claiming to have been short-changed on the bus.
THE leader of the Wagner mercenary group has been killed in a plane crash, but could this be more than a mere accident? Could it be… murder?
YOU Brits with your neat queues and willingness to wait, so proud of an achievement so boring. Italian Paolo Cinquetti explains how to swerve that cazzate:
ABROAD? You’ll happily trek over a mountain to see a 300-year-old pipe organ. You wouldn’t give a shit for any of these if they were in Morecambe.
A POPULATION known only as ‘non-Britons’ is also fleeing from the fires currently engulfing Rhodes, it has emerged.
TO Americans, Britain is Buckingham Palace, Stonehenge and Hogwarts. To maintain the illusion they should avoid these locations.
MIDDLE-CLASS holidaymakers in Sardinia are cooking huevos rancheros on the baking-hot tiles outside their villa, it has emerged.
THE slavering parasite of the Commonwealth Games is looking for a new host to bleed dry, it has confirmed.