International

Three indictments does not feel like enough, says everyone

Six foreign tourist attractions you wouldn't look at twice if they were in Britain

ABROAD? You’ll happily trek over a mountain to see a 300-year-old pipe organ. You wouldn’t give a shit for any of these if they were in Morecambe.

Non-Britons also fleeing Rhodes

A POPULATION known only as ‘non-Britons’ is also fleeing from the fires currently engulfing Rhodes, it has emerged.

Wetherspoons at last orders, and other British locations that will shatter American tourists' illusions

TO Americans, Britain is Buckingham Palace, Stonehenge and Hogwarts. To maintain the illusion they should avoid these locations.

Middle-class couple in Sardinia cooking huevos rancheros on pavement

MIDDLE-CLASS holidaymakers in Sardinia are cooking huevos rancheros on the baking-hot tiles outside their villa, it has emerged.

Commonwealth Games parasite searching for host

THE slavering parasite of the Commonwealth Games is looking for a new host to bleed dry, it has confirmed.

Brits abroad to combat extreme heat with extreme drinking

BRITONS in Spain are to fight 45-degree heatwaves by drinking up to 45 pints a day.

Caught up with mates and went on a spontaneous trip: my kind of weekend, with Vladimir Putin

MORNING. Have nice weekend? Mine good too. Caught up with mates and went on day trip. Low key vibes, you know?

Wagner Group arrives at North Yorkshire caravan park for break

THE Wagner Group of mercenaries, withdrawn from Ukraine after a brief mutiny, has arrived at a North Yorkshire caravan park for a fortnight’s break.

Silvio Berlusconi's posthumous guide to living your best life

BILLIONAIRE media magnate, AC Milan’s saviour, prime minister and certainly never involved in the Mafia, Trump and Johnson are mere pale imitations of me.