International

Things Trump says being reported as if they have meaning

RANDOM phrases that squirt out while Donald Trump is opening and closing his mouth are being reported as if they bear actual meaning.

You'd think he'd be hard to miss, says world

WHILE not hoping for his death the world has opined that Donald Trump, who is big and orange in a red hat, would surely be hard to miss.

We ask you: which British millionaires would you like to see piss off forever?

MULTI-millionaires are fleeing the UK for shit-boring tax havens in their droves. Which rich Brit would you cheer off at Heathrow?

Who won the presidential debate if one party spouted provably false bullshit throughout?

THE US presidential debate was a contest between a candidate who spent 90 minutes trying and failing to keep up with his own obvious lies, and another one. Who won?

Seven questions Kamala Harris could usefully ask the nutter at tonight's debate

HARRIS and Trump face off tonight for a televised debate. Demanding answers to the following questions could be useful.

We ask you: what music should Trump play at his rallies?

SOUL legend Isaac Hayes is the latest of many killjoy artists stopping Donald Trump playing their music at his rallies. What music would be suitable?

Germany voting far-right out of nostalgia for the good old days

GERMANS are voting for far-right parties to bring back the halcyon days of electing a far-right leader, committing genocide and being utterly destroyed within 12 years.