Relationships

A PAIR of preening wankers are unsure whether they should make their inability to choose between surnames the world and their future children’s problem.

A MAN whose date cut all contact after their second meeting is unashamedly referring to her as his ex-girlfriend.

AS Cher said, if you want to know if he loves you so it’s in his kiss. And she did not mean upstairs. These famous men live to go down, you can see it in their faces.

EVERYONE on every dating app has f**ked everyone else on every other dating app, leading to a fall in usage.

YOUR ex-partner who has not contacted you in years now has a life worth envying so would love to meet you for a coffee.

IT’S emerged that murderer Lyle Menendez, recently featured in a Netflix true-crime drama, is dating a young British student. And he’s not the only undeserving person who’s having more sexual success than you...

NEITHER member of a couple are finding a basque and suspenders sexy despite both enthusiastically pretending to, it has emerged.

TRYING to impress a woman? Has she noticed a minor scar on your otherwise, you believe, unblemished body? These lies should get her into bed.

A COMMITMENT-PHOBIC man has explained the condition which has condemned him to a life of meaningless hook-ups and serial infidelity deserves nothing but sympathy.

AN apathetic man is unaware he and his girlfriend are in a polyamorous relationship, it has emerged.